We’re going through changes

I look back on pictures of myself and my family 20 years ago, and wonder how many changes have taken place for us all personally, materially, and in our relationships with others since then. No matter what or who have came in and out of my life, one thing has always been a constant – my family. Coming from a rather ‘dysfunctional’ set up (well, it feels pretty normal to me!) I’m used to adapting and accepting whatever has come my way. Always being open to change. To be less cryptic, I’m talking about things like not meeting my Dad for the first time until I was three years old, being an only child for 15 years, experiencing parents with various different relationships and partners over the years, and by the age of 23 I am now a sister to two siblings from my mum, and more recently two siblings by my dad. Christmas at Mum’s house, boxing day at Dad’s house. It’s the way I’ve always known it to be, but I guess I still wouldn’t have it any other way.

I get nostalgic over this sort of thing especially when I know my mum was my age now, 23, when she had me. It makes me wonder how I would have dealt with the situation. The fear (of pretty much everything) and my dad not initially being there for her. Hearing in awe how she handled things, I imagine the same mum then as I see going about her day to day life right now. Creative, loving, independent, and pretty damn selfless. My mum has brought me up being very open when it comes to talking about life (which is why you get to put up with these lovely long chats of mines!) and the fact that you can not change the direction of the wind but you can always adjust your sails.

After living life with a less than normal family set up, you can imagine how intrigued I was when finding out years ago that my Grandpa (on my Dad’s side) whom I have never had the chance to meet due to him and my Gran splitting, had a son in his new marriage not long after I was born. After plenty of questions and also plenty of years later, I felt like I was finally of the age to action getting in touch with this Uncle, my dad’s half brother. After finding out the complicated history on my Dad’s side, I knew that this wouldn’t be as easy or straightforward as my other family experiences have been. I was given a word of warning for hurt and rejection, but this situation wasn’t any less awkward or strange as what I’d been through before and survived/came out the other end of. So I went in with an open heart and open mind, and fast forward to 4 months later I guess I can say fortune does favor the brave. The nitty gritty details can stay where they belong, but what I can say is that I am so excited for this new chapter in my life. After getting things back on track in the last year and having my family and best friends around me, good work prospects, a new home and a new outlook on life I now have a new member of my family to add to that addition. I finally got to meet my Uncle Greig (feels wierd saying that, he is a year younger than me!) for the first time, and we have been building a great relationship with each other ever since. He is quickly becoming one of my closest friends, and I really do regret not being able to have known him earlier on in our lives, due to a situation we were born into, which was completely outwith our control. But I am so looking forward to making up for lost time. Plus, he is one cool guy! And actually has a blog (which he might kill me for sharing the link) but here he is 🙂 Edit: Just realised I have been linking to a youtube video rather than Greig’s blog. DOH! Have updated it with the proper link now, and in the flesh it is http://through-a-hole-in-the-world.blogspot.co.uk/

Anyways, I ended up writing a bit more about that than what I planned to. But I hope if you have been in a similar situation you can take comfort in knowing things do end up working out the way they are meant to. No matter how crazy, unusual, or dysfunctional you think your family set up may be! Here’s some other things which have been making me smile recently: